August 26, 2015 · 8:35 pm
…there are times when a man’s gotta do what a man’s gotta do… and if what yeez do gets yeez labelled as ‘daft’ from time to time, then so be it…. guilty as charged, m’Lud… where I live in the Middle East demands regular jaunts to the local shopping Mega-Mall (oh happy day, right!) for provisions… some respite from the trolley-pushing ennui and queue-jumpers can be had… especially from my ‘favourite’ guys (it’s ALWAYS a guy) who line up in front of me at the ‘10 items or less, and cash only’ with half the bluudy store in his basket, and only a credit card with which to pay… the coffee shops dotted around the place offer barista-populated havens of escape, and a temporary lull in the lunacy of trying to negotiate yer ‘mind-of-its-own’ trolley with a bent front wheel guiding to anywhere except where yeez want to propel it… then I do some serious people-watching… a pleasure that never ceases to delight… unless yeez live in Noo Yawk, in which case DO NOT EYEBALL OTHER PERSONS!… but here in sunny Kamel Kuntry, the concourses are filled with an endless succession of people-cameoed vignettes… yeez prob’ly do sum’thing similar yerselves… p’raps at airports, or train stations… yeez know the kinda thing… and without fail, the best amusement comes from observing the antics of children… regardless of how many parents attend them, kids frequently veer off and just do there own ‘thang’…
…today’s highlight was a wee boy, not older than about four, dressed in best denims and a baseball hat worn fashionably, back-to-front… in his hand he held the most dangerous weapon known to Mall-kind… a plastic coat hanger… well yeez might have thought it was a plastic coat hanger, but this lad had other ideas… in his clutch, his mind held a longbow, replete with deadly arrows drawn from an invisible quiver just at the back of his shoulder… the pantomime of drawing back the bow and letting fly these arrows was better than anything yeez have ever seen in Robin Hood movies…
…invisible to everybody else, except himself and me, they shot all over the place… he caught my eye watching him, and I couldn’t help myself… I rose from my coffee, with my hands in the air, looking as if I were trying to escape… but, no hiding place for Master Gallacher, I’m afraid… with great glee he ‘fired’ his arrow at me, with an attendant audible ‘whoosh’… I mimicked the best ‘arrow-pierced’ target yeez could imagine… the process repeated about four or five times… then the real magic kicked in… another man across the way raised his hands toward the celling… aha… another ‘victim’ for the miniature Robin… the invisble arrow got the other fellow in the chest… at least that’s where his hands grabbed… before yeez could say ‘Friar Tuck’, we had about ten people involved, being shot at with invisible arrows from this deadly coat hanger… with imagination like his, I think that wee boy’s gonna be a writer! …I haven’t had so much fun at a Mall, EVER… ‘daft’? me?… you betcha!!!… and it was great… see yeez later… LUV YEEZ!…
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